[Parody] Michael Jackson - Black or White

This was written with Amy, Scott, & Monish, for their closing song in their Med Revue. I'll try and upload a video of the performance when I can

Original Lyrics

Parody

I Took My Baby On A Saturday Bang Boy Is That Girl With You Yes We're One And The Same Now I Believe In Miracles And A Miracle Has Happened Tonight (hee) But, If You're Thinkin' About My Baby It Don't Matter If You're Black Or White They Print My Message In The Saturday Sun I Had To Tell Them I Ain't Second To None And I Told About Equality And It's True Either You're Wrong Or You're Right But, If You're Thinkin' About My Baby It Don't Matter If You're Black Or White (Don’t you bet!) (heeehee) I Am Tired Of This Devil I Am Tired Of This Stuff I Am Tired Of This Business So When The Going Gets Rough I Ain't Scared Of Your Brother I Ain't Scared Of No Sheets I Ain't Scare Of Nobody Girl When The Goin' Gets Mean [L. T. B. Rap Performance] Protection For Gangs, Clubs And Nations Causing Grief In Human Relations It's A Turf War On A Global Scale I'd Rather Hear Both Sides Of The Tale See, It's Not About Races Just Places Faces Where Your Blood Comes From Is Where Your Space Is I've Seen The Bright Get Duller I'm Not Going To Spend My Life Being A Color [Michael] Don't Tell Me You Agree With Me When I Saw You Kicking Dirt In My Eye But, If You're Thinkin' About My Baby It Don't Matter If You're Black Or White I Said If You're Thinkin' Of Being My Baby It Don't Matter If You're Black Or White I Said If You're Thinkin' Of Being My Brother It Don't Matter If You're Black Or White It's Black, It's White It's Tough For You To Get By It's Black , It's White, Whoo It's Black, It's White It's Tough For You To Get By It's Black , It's White, Whoo -----------------------------

I gave my statement for the insurance claim I tell my patients that I’m never to blame Things started to get spiritual As the patient started to flat line At the end of the tunnel when you see it Don’t go into the light I had a finger up in a patient’s bum I may have sneezed and he got a perforation And I wish I worked the city But in rural I know I’m always right At the end of the tunnel when you see it Don’t go into the light Compress the chest! (heeehee) Cut myself with the scalpel Oops I broke my gloves That’s why it’s called a Practice Blood all over my scrubs Better not be a lawyer Get the ECG Leads “Tried” to repair your body But then I lost your spleen [Rap] Operation full of com- plications Causing grief to all my patients The blood loss turns you and I pale End up like MJ’s doc in jail See, I do hip replaces lift faces cases Using defib paddles like tasers Scalpel knife gets duller Putting the letters ER into Error [Michael] Don’t tell all of the patients That the hippocratic oath is a lie So, I can’t interpret xrays what is that bit that’s black or white? I don't know which lung has the cancer Should I cut open the left or right? I’m rethinking of being a doctor Sick of giving old men the kiss of life On call, all night, in ICU, So give me some slack, all right On call, all night It’s tough for us to get by, I’m not, always right, Whoooo I’ll keep my job, and get by, as long as you stay alive

Chasing the Dragonite

This morning, walking around the 'hood playing Pokemon Go shivering from the cold in my baggy sweatpants and even baggier eyes, I finally find and catch a Scyther. Just 40 metres away, I notice a man in his 30's wearing trackies and a hoodie, just lounging in the area repetitively swiping on his phone. I presumed he was a fellow Pokemon player fighting the gym since he was swiping left & right repetitively, so being in an overly friendly and happy mood, I decided to excitedly approach him:

"Hey you know you can get a Scyther over there?!"

"A-what?" he replies

"A Scyther. It took several berries, but man the buzz you get when you finally get something new you know?!" I beam with a smile "And best of the luck going after the dragon mate [referring to the Gyarados at the gym], it's like over 1500-"
At this point I see his phonescreen and the only app he's swiping on, is a photo album, and I was sorely mistaken:
"-Uh...Nevermind, forget that"

"Um, okay..." 

As I walk away, the fella runs up to me and flashes his badge "I'm actually a cop. You're a local right? Seen any suspicious drug activity lately?"

"Oh! Um, well I've been around this area from 1-2am for the last few nights after work and I haven't really seen anyone around"

"What are you doing here at those hours?" he asks with a quizzical eyebrow

"Not really sure, but yeah catching Pokemon after a busy 10 hour hospital shift sounds about right"

"Oh... yeah nevermind"

Google later reveals that 'Scyther' is slang for marijuana in the Bay area, 'berry' can mean ecstasy, and 'chasing the dragon' refers to smoking opium, or the elusive pursuit of the ultimate high in the usage of some particular drug.

Besides nearly incriminating myself as a local druggie, I guess in a way, I'm in the elusive pursuit of the ultimate high... catching 'em all. Childhood nostalgia is my drug.

Good Morning

Instead of groaning, then rolling out of bed with a grumble as usual, this morning I uncharacteristically sprang out of bed, strode to the mirror and confidently whispered to myself "Let's do this" 
Upon realising that today's a day off, I pointed to myself and replied "Well what do we say to the God of Procrastination? Not today"  then slithered back in between the comfortable sheets of apathy and languor, to hibernate further into the warmth of idleness with a smile.
As I drifted off, I decided to convert to the religion of Snoozaism, an expression of the covenantal relationship between St Mattress and the Children of the Pillow. Sleeping in on Sundays is a sacrament. My God didn't create the world in seven days. He dreamt it. Hell is the hot side of the pillow. Purgatory is the snooze button on an alarm clock. ‪#‎newtonsfirstlaw‬

[Parody] Justin Bieber's Sorry - Hangry

Is it too late now to say sorry?

Cause I regret what I said when I was hungry

We've all had those days where we become irritable and snappy just because we haven't had our stomach's satisfied. Here's an apologetic song for those moments.

Original tune the following parody is based off: 

 
Parody lyrics in the right column: 
n.b. Italics indicate an aggressive tone. Like a piano sheet, but instead of allegro, aggro.

Justin Bieber - Sorry	Parody
You gotta go and get angry at all of my honesty You know I try but I don't do too well with apologies I hope I don't run out of time, can someone call a referee? Cause I just need, one more shot, at forgiveness I know you know that I made those mistakes maybe once or twice By once or twice I mean maybe a couple of hundred times So let me, oh let me redeem, oh redeem myself tonight Cause I just need one more shot at second chances	You gotta know I get angry when I'm really just hungry I become more irrational than vegans appalled of cheese Unless you have coeliac, shutting the fuck up is gluten-free Cause I just eat, for my thoughts, to help digest I know you know that I eat twice the suggested serving size By once or twice I mean maybe a couple of hundred times What's the point, of a fridge light, if you don't snack at midnight Cause it's food, it doesn't judge, it understands me
Yeah Is it too late now to say sorry? Cause I'm missing more than just your body ooh Is it too late now to say sorry? Yeah I know that I let you down Is it too late to say that I'm sorry now?	Yeah Is it too late now to say sorry? Cause I regret what I said when I was hungry ooh I get so irate when I'm on empty Yeah I bite when my stomach growls If I missed lunch don't hang around
I'm sorry, yeah Sorry, yeah Sorry Yeah I know that I let you down Is it too late to say sorry now?	I'm hungry yeah Angry yeah Hangry Yeah I know I had a meltdown So FUCKING GIVE ME MY GRILLED CHEESE NOW
I'll take every single piece of the blame if you want me to But you know that there is no innocent one in this game for two I'll go, I'll go and then you go, you go out and spill the truth Can we both say the words and forget this?	Fine I'll take a single slice of the cheesecake if you want me to But you know that there is no way I'm sharing this steak for two Vegies with cheese on a crouton, is just pizza say the truth Fold in half, and just say it's a sandwich?
Is it too late now to say sorry? Cause I'm missing more than just your body Is it too late now to say sorry? Yeah I know that I let you down Is it too late to say that I'm sorry now?	Is it too late now to say sorry? Cause I regret what I said when I was hungry I get so irate when I'm on empty Yeah I know I had a meltdown Sorry I'm just not myself right now
I'm not just trying to get you back on me Cause I'm missing more than just your body Is it too late now to say sorry? Yeah I know that I let you down Is it too late to say sorry now?	I'm swear I'm eating more healthy (oh nono) Cause I'm asking for more guacamole Is it too late now for more curry? Yeah give me dumplings to chow down and some nuggets, pasta plus hashbrowns
I'm sorry, yeah Sorry, oh Sorry Yeah I know that I let you down Is it too late to say sorry now?	I'm hangry yeah Hangry yeah Hangry Yeah give me icecream calm me down OR I'LL MAKE YOU FUCKING SORRY NOW

Previous post: Valentine Throwback
Previous parodies:  Frozen's Let it Go & Ed Sheeran's A-Team

Valentine Throwback

To celebrate Valentine's day, here's throwback to a fun 2011 skit I wrote about a man empathising with his mate over relationship issues.

Link: I <3 Ribs
<Lights up>
<B gets off the phone and gives a long sigh>
 
E: What’s wrong B?

B: I am having girlfriend trouble…

E: What, you can't find one? Kehehe.

B:  argg…you know this is the reason I'm glad my girlfriend is

E: -imaginary?

B:  No, lives in another state.

E: ...of mind? kehehe

B: No! Anyway, the problem.... it’s about sex.

E: What your imaginary girlfriend gave you imaginary herpes? Kehehe.

B: Erghh. Seriously, why do I attempt to bother having these discussions with you. Forget about it.

E: Ok, no, tell me. I’ll listen.

B: Nah forget about it

E: I’ll be serious this time.

B: Really?

E: I swear, no jokes.

B: ok…  You know that look women get when they want sex?

E: <Thinks for a second> No

B: No?... me neither…  Well I always wants to get down to do the hanky-panky, but it’s always the wrong time. She keeps telling me she has to be in the ‘mood’… (sigh) sometimes don't you just wish there was a female version of Viagra?"

E: No, not really. Why, has your girlfriend got a really flaccid penis? kehehe

B: aghhh.
<lights down>


In the mood for something more romantic?
Check out this two and a half minute musical item from the same show: Time :)

Related post: 2014 Valentine's - He wants the V-day
Previous post: A Preacher Curl

A Preacher Curl

People spend thousands of dollars to maintaining their cars, neglecting to take care of the one vehicle we have to go all through life with:
our own body

Instead of buying clothes to look good, you should first prioritise spending time making the frame you put the clothes is excellent. A Lamborghini with a plain coat of black looks better than a Toyota Prius with a chrome finish.

 'My body is a temple'

It goes without saying, but health is intrinsically linked to a good life. Thankfully I am healthy, but I've grown more preoccupied with the idea of exercise becoming a regular mandatory routine similar to brushing your teeth. So I recently joined a gym for the period of a month to see what the fuss was all about to literally & figuratively put the abs in my flabs (heh... 'figure' it out? hurdur... I'll shut up).

It was truly an eye-opening activity, given I did not know squat about squats (sorry not sorry).

Asians are great at squatting. That's why we're world renown for our big booty.

.

After a few weeks, I realised going to the gym, was like church for fitness freaks

A place for worship

In the beginning, you wake up in the morning not really wanting to go, but after you come home, your mind feels lighter and happier that you did. It's a world full of strange terminology, and whose workers are always inspiring you to try your best. It's a field that takes discipline and sacrifice to stick to the core tenets. Followers have faith that their current suffering is temporary, and there is bliss at the end of the tunnel.
Protein shakes are our holy water, circuit classes our communion. Instead of hymns, we have Electronic Dance Music; songs you grow sick of, but still love.There are people from all walks of life, looking for strength in tough times. There are also hardcore fanatics who you dismiss as a bit crazy but secretly wish you were as motivated as they were.

"Stupid sexy Flanders" - Homer, Greek Poet

The following is a prayer I wrote for ye disciples of the pump:

A gym session is like following the Game of Thrones series. You're in agony, but it's a good hurt.
But I found that it's not just a physical effort to go to the gym that's the most strenuous, but the mental one. It's hard to maintain the drive to keep going when you don't see the results immediately, but you quickly learn that the best way to keep your chin up is by doing a chin-up (I can do 5 now...yay!).

Maybe gyms should also offer a membership package where you pay for every day that you don't go.

I guess that's what my gym membership already is.

Broverbs 1:12 Gospel of St.Hetics

If you're interested in another vanity-related post check out:
Attention Guys: How To Captivate a Woman's Attention Immediately!

A Light Hearted Dance

To celebrate the upcoming Halloween, here's a post about a dance I choreographed and performed in for Cirque Du Surgery (UNSW Med Revue 2013).

Behind the scenes:

16150 cells in this Excel table

My co-choreographer Ben and I went through sequencing which circuit which light-suits would switch on and off at every millisecond. Above is a brief screenshot of how we did it.

The lyrics to Skrillex

Also since we were using dub-step in the finale of the dance, and that genre sounds like a bunch of industrial noise, it was challenging to choreograph and sequence to every sound we heard. As you can see on the right, I wrote some lyrics so the dancers and I, could keep track of what was happening. Sadly, it's now one of the few songs I know the whole 'lyrics' too (Dubstep karoake anyone?).

Choreography and stunts during that light section happened in the space of about one week. It was super fun, but intense trying to meet all the deadlines. The fragile suits had only just started being finished, meaning limited time to practice and also issues like which crazy moves were feasible and broken wires arose. I may also have incurred a carpet burn on my head whilst face-planting after a stunt gone wrong.
I wish I had more time, and made that section longer, bigger, more epic, but I didn't account for the amount of man-hours it would take to just make the suits themselves. For just university students, I think we did well with our limited resources.
Also coming up with choreography that was unique and not just doing an easy copy-cat of what's been done already with the concept is what I hope I for. One tiny example of originality I'm proud of, is the illusion where one suit 'jumps' into another suit. In my head I can still visualise so many more things with light suit dances that haven't even been done by the professional troupes.



I spent an unreasonable amount of time on sound editing with Audacity (probably over a hundred hours) since I didn't just want a generic sound-track. I wanted humour, stunts, interesting sound fx,blended in an entertaining ball of craziness that exploded in a visual spectacle.
To do this, I mixed and edited over 13 music songs, and countless sound effects (I sourced over 300 sound files throughout the process). I probably enjoyed crafting the loop build-up to Gorillaz Feel Good the most, and spent most of the time crafting from bare-bones, the entire robotic section and percussion beats into Ben Lee's Catch My Disease.

Tracks that were cut but discarded include: Cypress Hill - Insane in the Brain, Owl City - Fireflies [I wanted suits to combine and make a huge flying insect illusion], Stan Walker - Light it Up, Jay Sean - Hit the Lights, Kanye West - All Of The Lights, Ellie Goulding - Lights, DJ Earworm - United State of Pop 2013 [Each song would be represented by a lit-up dancer], and La Roux - Bulletproof (Hyper crush remix) [as the finale instead of Skrillex].

The actual engineering process behind the EL Wire suits belongs to Hamish Pain, head of the special effects team. He's the brain behind the Arduino controllers and all that funky magical Wi-Fi stuff. It's basically impossible to compensate him for the hundreds of hours he put into leading them the team in designing the suits themselves. From sewing to trouble-shooting, and programming, his geekiness was our godsend.

 

Hamish and two directors helping construct the suits

Many late nights, and thousands of stitches

A sweatshop of trial and error

Aldri Indrayana, a talented guy with a background in fashion design, helped sketch the design of the suits. Each circuit; skeletal, arterial and venous had to be done in one continuous line. It took several iterations from the initial TRON inspired sketches, to get to the final version.

The very beginning. Pink ribs anyone?

Idea for the design on the back; a combined huge laughing skull

Final skeleton

As a medical student, I was finally happy when it was more anatomically realistic

Of course executing this design was troubling itself as EL wires aren't exactly easy to hold in complex intricate shapes.

Before green skulls on a balaclava, the initial idea involved black facemasks

That circle heart (aka Iron Man's Arc Reactor)

Hunger Games + Matrix

 

  

The whole squad

Thanks guys and everyone else that was involved :)


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